I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
