I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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