found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
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