Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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