No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
this hospital has no fireball
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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