i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
