why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
