How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
