today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Dick very happy bro
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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