everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
