Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
