Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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