i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
