YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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