McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
