My Higher Power is John Stamos
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Randomize
