I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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