I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
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