u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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