I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
