he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
