You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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