dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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