Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
