drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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