1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
