did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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