feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
