im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
