she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
You're breaking my sexual little heart
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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