If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
