I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
