doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
