just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
