My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize