Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
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