Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Randomize
