Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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