Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
