Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
