and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
