how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
That's how pantless uber rides happen
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
