I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
