I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
