i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
