You really coming over, don't trick.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
My vagina is officially offended.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
