is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize