how can u be prego again
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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