gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
