Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
